i heart new york

i've been really cranky recently. but i'm trying to change that - i'm trying to be more friendly to strangers, to hold doors for people, to look people in the eye and smile, to say please and thank you and have a nice day. and it helps. it makes me have a better day. i recommend it.

i got on a very crowded subway (4 train) at rush hour thursday morning. it was super crowded. just as the doors were closing, a man ran into the car, right behind me. as the subway started to move, he reached for the pole a couple of feet from us. with a closed fist. rather than grab the pole, he punched me right in the cheekbone. hard. so hard i yelled "oh my god!" he mumbled a half-hearted "sorry" and lunged for the pole. i spent the ride from 86th street to 59th with tears running down my face - shocked that not a single person on the train reacted to the fact that someone had been punched in the face, hurting and worried that i was going to arrive at work with a black eye and a swollen face, itching to punch the guy back. by the time we arrived at 59th street, what i wanted most of all was to turn to him, look him in the eye, and say "i hope you have a really really bad day. "

but i didn't. i changed to the N train and continued to work. my cheek was tender all day, but no bruise.

and seriously, who reaches for the pole on a crowded subway car WITH A CLOSED FIST!?!